Thursday, June 28, 2012

Complexities

Moving back to India is always in the lines for a lot of Indians who move to the US, especially. So when I left for the states to pursue my higher education, I had always thought that I would go back after my graduation. I spent about 5 years after graduation there. In the meantime, I got married and also had a baby there. By the time my baby turned 1, me and my husband knew that if we really wanted to go back, it has to be sometime soon. We did not want a 5 year old to crib and complaint when we went back. So we moved when Dhruva (my son) was a year and a half old. It was always about how difficult it was going to be for our son to settle down that we did not pay much attention to how things might turn out for us. Our thought process was that since we lived through most of our lives in India, 7 years was not going to make a huge difference in our case. BIG MISTAKE!!

Things turned out to be difficult for us. In the beginning it was the weather, the traffic, the food, the inflation and so on. But after we started working, we found the huge difference in the way a business is conducted in India. We found the commanding and authoritative managing style out dated and simply a failure. I was not able to understand those meaningless meetings that went on forever. I found the failure of time management on a large scale at my work place. In general, people here are not used to following time. There was no clear line between work timings and family time. Weekends and work days alike. I found that it was very normal for people to spend an hour or two at the most with family on the weekdays and not much more during the off days. Work style was horrible. I was not able to find time for my son. It was a very pressurizing situation. I was not able to balance work and family. I found out that it was time to make that decision to take a break and concentrate my time and energy in taking care of my little one.The story of my work life here is one big complexity.

The situation with my family was not very enthusiastic either. After my time in the US, my personality went through a lot of change. I think that is normal. I found that I was not alone in this after a brief chat with a friend who lived in the US and came down to spend a few months in India with family. Our priorities have changed and what is important and precious here in India might not be as important to us now. And getting everyone to be on the same page is impossible.


Tuesday, April 10, 2012

My windy days in the US

I spent 8 great years in the United States of America. I always wanted to go back to India. I just did not know when. I got married to my college sweet heart and had a baby the next year. It was then that both of us decided that my baby needs to grow up surrounded by  grand parents and great grand parents. So we booked our tickets to India. And I was into all the packing and cleaning up. Me and the baby would move first and my husband was to follow us 6 months later. We really did not have much time to imagine how India was going to be or even if things would be different. I was totally immersed in packing and selling off furniture and what not.. I do not remember thinking too much about making such a huge decision. We wanted to move and so we went ahead and did it. All I felt was this unsettling feeling, I cannot exactly explain it.

Today, its been more than a year since we moved back and I continue to have that feeling. Though I am here for good, some part of me still believes that I am catching a flight sometime soon.

One thing that I realized after moving back is that, it is easier to settle down here if we don't compare living in the US and living in India. All of us found it difficult to get used to American life when we first moved there. That is the same thing when someone comes back to India and settles down after a while. Give yourself some time to get used to life here. 

There are quite a few things that I missed here. I miss the enchiladas and chilli cheese fries and the creamy shrimp Alfredo pasta. I miss the barbecue s on the cool fall afternoons.Well the good news is that we can make all the above delicacies here with a little change to the recipes. Alfredo pasta sauce is available in most of the supermarkets here. If you own a crock-pot, making chilli is relatively simple. And making enchiladas is a breeze if you have a decent oven and good meat. I prefer minced beef and I am still trying to find good beef in Chennai.

Apart from the food, I miss watching Seinfeld. My Friday evenings used to be spent watching Seinfeld non-stop with home delivery pizza and soda. I also used to watch Law & order, SVU. 

But most of all, I miss the peace and quiet that I had in good Ol' Carlsbad, New Mexico..
Chennai is a busy city and peace and quiet is something that belongs in dreams here.