Time

Time truly has the power to heal. I learnt this quite recently. If you have read my previous posts about settling down in India, you would understand what I mean. Its been almost 6 years since I moved back to India. Its been quite a process of "settling down". But today, even if I was given a chance to go anywhere else in the world, I would have to decline!

It slowly grows on you, this idea of HOME. Once you get used to the freedom, its difficult to let go. We all understand that there are upsides and downsides to very thing. We all choose to look at the upsides if the situation suits us. So I found a few upsides that has truly helped in my transformation.

Our nation is rich in its heritage,culture and tradition.By chance I read the Tamil novel "Ponniyin Selvan" by Kalki Krishnamurthy. By the end of it, I was hooked. I started reading books about Tamil history. The ancient lifestyles, practices, architecture, food,love etc thrilled me. I am bowled over by the deep detailed knowledge of temple building. It was a art form in itself. The richness of each of the major kingdoms of South India namely, Chera, Chola, Pandya and Pallava, had their own signature which shows through their ever lasting stone temples. I have started visiting these living treasures of architecture. Each temple speaks volumes of the King who donated generously in its upkeep, the reasons behind the building of the temple, cows, goats, jewellery, lands donated by courts-men and generals of the King and so on..

Where will I find ancient temples and Jain caves full of inscriptions elsewhere in the world? 
I have found my calling. Whats yours?

New Beginning

I lived in the US of A for a few years. Like a lot of youngsters from India, I went for my higher education and ended up working there for a while. Though everything was good, I found an empty space in me, like there was something missing right from the beginning. After a point of time I got used to the empty space and it did not bother me later on. Eventually I got married and had a baby. My husband and I decided we should go back to India so that our son could have the opportunity of spending time with his grandparents and great grand parents. Yes he is blessed with so many great people. That was 3 years ago. We moved back in the year 2011. The truth is it was a very difficult transition. I was dragging myself to work everyday. I was tired all the time. The heat, food, electricity situation, traffic and so many other things were just driving me crazy. I quit my job after 1 long year of struggle to find a reason to why I chose to work in a bank. I spent 3 months with my beautiful baby boy and kept looking out for reasons to go back to the US. I never thought about why I should remain here. I was selfish. That is all I can say now. A lot of people will disagree. But I cannot lie. And now when I am happy and content with what I am doing, I have to say that I am glad I stayed...

Through the few months after I quit my job, I started working on a lot of projects from home. I started blogging, started writing a book, planned out a complete lifestlye website for young and working women. All this kept me occupied. But the incomplete feeling continued. I kept looking for ways to block that feeling, instead of trying to go after it and finding out what the true yearning was. After we moved I missed the sprawling supermarkets and the "Fresh" section filled with fruits and vegetables. And so food became an issue. I love going out shopping for fresh vegetables and fruits. I missed the "Whole Foods" experience here. I looked around for good organic food stores around Chennai and visited some of them. I did not like what I saw. Then out of the blue I got an opportunity to visit a farm that belongs to a friend of my father. It was an organic farm and as he started talking about the ways and methods practiced, I fell in love. I knew that this is what I had been waiting for all this time. At that point my husband had also quit his job and both of us started working on our little organic store project. We started looking for more organic farmers. In the beginning it was very tough to talk to them and visit these farms. We were also learning about the various certifications available and how to know whether they were practicing organic methods. A wise friend of mine used to tell me that when something is meant to happen, the whole world would come to you and make it happen. That really happened. After the first month or so we started meeting a lot of like minded, good hearted people. We kept getting more and more references and our farms visits were increasing. We then sat down to name our store and start to market it. Our store is called Vaer, as in roots in Tamil. Vaer is not a regular organic store. We buy from farmers who are dedicated to the cause of saving the soil, water and the other species that depend on these resources as much as we do. We buy from groups that are formed to help farmers in need. Right from the beginning my husband and I were always interested in doing something that goes with the green and Eco conscious direction. When we landed at organic foods, we were sure that this was it. I would nt say that the empty space is completely filled, but the process to fill has started and my thirst for doing more and giving more is helping a lot.

We wanted to help the farmers who were in need and do our bit to this amazing society. This thought made us stick on and stay here. We love it now and are proud of ourselves for choosing to stay. We live with my grandparents. It is such a beautiful scene each day to  watch this intricate society that is intertwined with relationships and marriages that work well when each person in the family understands the balance of life. So go out there and try to find a tiny bit of happiness by giving. It helps..

This is our store logo. Visit our facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/vaerorganic

Our weblink is www.vaerorganic.com
Take the world by storm!!
Kayal

Complexities

Moving back to India is always in the lines for a lot of Indians who move to the US, especially. So when I left for the states to pursue my higher education, I had always thought that I would go back after my graduation. I spent about 5 years after graduation there. In the meantime, I got married and also had a baby there. By the time my baby turned 1, me and my husband knew that if we really wanted to go back, it has to be sometime soon. We did not want a 5 year old to crib and complaint when we went back. So we moved when Dhruva (my son) was a year and a half old. It was always about how difficult it was going to be for our son to settle down that we did not pay much attention to how things might turn out for us. Our thought process was that since we lived through most of our lives in India, 7 years was not going to make a huge difference in our case. BIG MISTAKE!!

Things turned out to be difficult for us. In the beginning it was the weather, the traffic, the food, the inflation and so on. But after we started working, we found the huge difference in the way a business is conducted in India. We found the commanding and authoritative managing style out dated and simply a failure. I was not able to understand those meaningless meetings that went on forever. I found the failure of time management on a large scale at my work place. In general, people here are not used to following time. There was no clear line between work timings and family time. Weekends and work days alike. I found that it was very normal for people to spend an hour or two at the most with family on the weekdays and not much more during the off days. Work style was horrible. I was not able to find time for my son. It was a very pressurizing situation. I was not able to balance work and family. I found out that it was time to make that decision to take a break and concentrate my time and energy in taking care of my little one.The story of my work life here is one big complexity.

The situation with my family was not very enthusiastic either. After my time in the US, my personality went through a lot of change. I think that is normal. I found that I was not alone in this after a brief chat with a friend who lived in the US and came down to spend a few months in India with family. Our priorities have changed and what is important and precious here in India might not be as important to us now. And getting everyone to be on the same page is impossible.

My windy days in the US

I spent 8 great years in the United States of America. I always wanted to go back to India. I just did not know when. I got married to my college sweet heart and had a baby the next year. It was then that both of us decided that my baby needs to grow up surrounded by  grand parents and great grand parents. So we booked our tickets to India. And I was into all the packing and cleaning up. Me and the baby would move first and my husband was to follow us 6 months later. We really did not have much time to imagine how India was going to be or even if things would be different. I was totally immersed in packing and selling off furniture and what not.. I do not remember thinking too much about making such a huge decision. We wanted to move and so we went ahead and did it. All I felt was this unsettling feeling, I cannot exactly explain it.

Today, its been more than a year since we moved back and I continue to have that feeling. Though I am here for good, some part of me still believes that I am catching a flight sometime soon.

One thing that I realized after moving back is that, it is easier to settle down here if we don't compare living in the US and living in India. All of us found it difficult to get used to American life when we first moved there. That is the same thing when someone comes back to India and settles down after a while. Give yourself some time to get used to life here. 

There are quite a few things that I missed here. I miss the enchiladas and chilli cheese fries and the creamy shrimp Alfredo pasta. I miss the barbecue s on the cool fall afternoons.Well the good news is that we can make all the above delicacies here with a little change to the recipes. Alfredo pasta sauce is available in most of the supermarkets here. If you own a crock-pot, making chilli is relatively simple. And making enchiladas is a breeze if you have a decent oven and good meat. I prefer minced beef and I am still trying to find good beef in Chennai.

Apart from the food, I miss watching Seinfeld. My Friday evenings used to be spent watching Seinfeld non-stop with home delivery pizza and soda. I also used to watch Law & order, SVU. 

But most of all, I miss the peace and quiet that I had in good Ol' Carlsbad, New Mexico..
Chennai is a busy city and peace and quiet is something that belongs in dreams here.